“I can brag about getting shitfaced on social media right now, it’s incredible.”
Local liberal, Glen Bodsworth is soaking down the libations at an incredible rate since Trump was announced to win the presidency. Liquor store sales have skyrocketed today.
“I drink a lot. Always have, probably always will. But it’s typically by myself, in the late afternoons, at home and I don’t tell people. I’m a high functioning alcoholic and that’s cool with me.”
Glen’s not alone. Posts all over Facebook have ranged from:
“I’m gonna have to have a grown up drink this morning.”
“Wonder if work will excuse us today.”
“I’m getting drunk as fuck, I’m so mad!”
Sorrows will be drowned in high amounts of vodka-tonics throughout the week as liberal’s find a legitimate path of self-destruction.