President Trump Says He Will Retire to Sarasota When Impeached

Prefacing the Comey Testimony on Wed at 10am EDT, President Trump has claimed he will be moving his home base to Sarasota, Florida when impeached.  The President was given market research showing his support in the community was higher among the primary resident demographic of 60 years old and over individuals than any other city in the country.

A White House official tells us the POTUS was shocked to learn it beat the obvious, openly racist and fundamentally backwards religious towns such as Mesa, Arizona and Oklahoma City.

Above all he was happy to hear SRQ embraces the old and wealthy while working to remove the poor.  He wasn’t excited about the tolerance for Muslims and Immigrants shown by the youthful generation of Sarasotians but said he could live with it and “possibly help to sway them in the right direction.”

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