Local Nut Job Goes To Heaven Thanks To “Going To Hell” Signs

Peter Nittheimer (48), a Sarasota resident, was hit by a Ford F-350 taking a right turn onto University this afternoon. Nittheimer was standing at the corner of University and the turn into the new University Town Center mall holding signs threatening Hell to passerbys (opposite side of signs shown in photograph). A strong Christian man, he assumed doing this would earn his passage into Heaven. We had a chance to sit down with God and he informed us Nittheimer did indeed end up through the pearly gates later that evening. Jesus assigned him a permanent duty immediately and gave him signs to hold pointing sinners in the direction of the escalators to Hell.

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