Sarasota Transplant Claiming to Have Invented the Word “Pecker” Proven Wrong by Egyptian Hieroglyphs

Chris Mackles moved to Sarasota from East Georgia in early 2009.  With him he brought a strange southern dialect unknown to the standard Jersey-raised, Florida resident.  One word in particular he uses daily, a word that has spread like fire across the Gulf Coast.  That word is “pecker,” referring to the male genitalia.

Mackles tells us, “It has many forms.  You can call people peckerheads, peckerwoods, peckerholes and so on.  It can also be used to actually refer to your pecker as well, in the literal sense and all.”

Mackles claims to have invented the word while growing up in Georgia.  Recent ungrounding of an ancient stone tablet in Egypt has proven Mackles not just wrong, but way fucking wrong.  It’s been in use for over 5000 years.  Upon hearing this news Mackles became irate.  Last we heard he was at Memories Lounge getting shit faced and telling locals to fuck off.

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